Cremaster Fanatic

Matthew's Opening - Simon

"Aw, shit," muttered Matthew Barney, while lying on the couch in his Manhattan loft. "It's about an hour until the opening and I'm sore as hell."

"What're you sore from? Jerking off?" joked Damien Hirst, England’s enfant-terrible of conceptual art, as he pounded the buttons of the PS2 on the couch on the opposite end of the room. Grand theft auto, his favorite game screamed from the wide-screen plasma TV.

"Jerking off and working out. It’s all you ever do Barney!” continued Hirst.

“Fuck YOU, and get your teeth fixed you English cunt. Pickled any sharks lately?” spat Barney, in mock anger.

Jeff Koons, who was sitting next to him, grinned as he tapped his index fingers rhythmically against the coffee table in front of the couch, quietly observing his friend’s interaction.

“Would you two pussies please shut the fuck up. I’m thinking about Ilona, and what I’m going to do with that sweet piece of ass next... Maybe I’ll make a giant Ilona out of fresh peaches and have 1,000,000 horny men jizz on her... YEAH!”

"Fuck you, man. Fuck both of you. Making Cremaster is a BITCH," Matthew griped.

“You guys have it easy. Other people do your shit. You’d never actaully build that giant peach Ilona. I actually have to DIRECT. I’m on set. It’s fucking hard. And I storyboard this shit out too. Bet neither of you has drawn a thing in years!”

Damien and Jeff stopped grinning. They had to find a way to cheer their friend up somehow. He was clearly really stressed and really cranky. And it would've sucked going to the opening at Gladstone with him in his current bad mood. The two men made their way to where Matthew was sitting on the couch.

"You want us to help you out in any way?" asked Damien, putting his arm around Matthew’s muscular shoulders.

"Yeah, anything we can do man, Mr. Big important director A R T E E S T E man..." added Jeff, putting his hand on Matthew's knee, a foolish expression locked on his face.

"Nah, it's okay, it's just..."

Matthew paused as he realized that Jeff had an ulterior motive in placing his hand on his knee. Jeff started rubbing his hand along his knee and his inner thigh. Damien, noticing Jeff’s moves, started caressing Matthew's chest with the hand that he had draped around him. Matthew wanted to say something, but he couldn’t.

He was speechless for once in his life.

He was glad that the two men were trying to cheer him up, but he really couldn't be doing this now. He had responsibilities! He had an important opening tonight for god’s sake! What would Barbara do if she found Jeff and Damien caressing him like this?

"Speechless, huh?" grinned Damien. "We have time enough for a quickie, I bet. What time are they sending the car?"


With that, he leaned in and planted a kiss on Matthew's lips. Matthew was desperate to say something, to object, but he just as quickly gave in and reciprocated the kiss, pressing his tongue against Damien's stubbly lips. Jeff, meanwhile, kicked off his shoes and blew into Matthew's ear. He was eager to do anything that would cheer his friend up, and he had absolutely no problem with it if that "anything" meant sex.

Damien and Matthew had also kicked off their own shoes, contributing to a relaxed atmosphere. Damien and Matthew continued kissing while Jeff licked and sucked on Matthew's ear, which caused him to shudder. Interrupting this foreplay, Jeff inched down towards the foot of the bed and, grabbing Matthew's left foot, slowly uncurled the sock that had adorned it. Pushing the fabric up over the sole and lifting it off completely, he exposed Matthew's bare right foot.

Damien was encouraged to do the same, and so shifted his position, inched down the bed and removed the cotton covering of Matthew's right foot. The two men played with Matthew's feet in their hands for awhile, massaging his tender soles and pushing their fingers in and out between Matthew's toes. They wiggled the toes of each foot between their index fingers and thumbs and traced their fingers along the contours of Matthew's feet, which elicited a giggle from the ticklish Matthew.

The two men continued playing with Matthew's feet in this manner until Jeff, usually the shy, performed the extraordinarily kinky act of sucking on Matthew's toe. He slipped his mouth over Matthew's left big toe, sucking on the digit and running his tongue along the edges of his toenail. Damien was admittedly turned on by this spectacle, and also felt prompted to do the same. Still massaging his sole, Damien let his mouth latch onto Matthew's right big toe and sucked it as Jeff had, snaking his tongue all around the fleshy digit and gliding it across his toenail. Matthew sighed with pleasure at his chims sucking on his toes and then realized the advantageous position he was in.

Both Damien and Jeff’s feet were in his face, and the pleasant odor of their socked feet wafted by him, which stirred him into action. He de-socked Jeff first, exposing his large size 11 feet. His toes were long and skinny, and there was a large space between his big and second largest toes. He next unveiled Damien's feet, rolling off the sock fabric and exposing his pink soles. His size 12 feet smelled strongly of sneaker sweat, an aroma that just happened to be appealing to Matthew. While Damien and Jeff continued to suck on Matthew's toes, Matthew extended his tongue and ran it along Damien's right foot, which left a trail of his spittle in its wake. This caused Damien to start suddenly, and after the initial awesome shock, his own toe sucking increased in fervor. His mouth slipped over two of Matthew's toes, then three. He sucked with glee, delighting in the taste of his mate and friend's toe flavor. Jeff was having similar thoughts as he went to town on Matthew's feet, his lip coming into contact with the warm flesh of Matthew's feet as he worked his lips up and down each one of the toes on Matthew's left foot.

Matthew, meanwhile, was overwhelmed at the choices he had to make. For the moment, he concentrated on Damien's right foot, sucking on his toes and running his tongue along the undersides of the toes. Damien and Jeff concentrated on rubbing their free feet all over Matthew's face, along his cheeks and over his neck and through his hair. Matthew was simply in heaven as his friends feet roamed all over him, and the bulge in his pants was as hard as it could possibly get.

Matthew then focused his attention on Jeff's feet. He sucked Jeff's big toe into his mouth and swirled his tongue around it, coating it in his foot-flavored saliva. He ran his tongue along his large sole and indulged in the flavor of his sweaty feet. Unable to prevent himself from really indulging, he grabbed Damien's left and Jeff's right
feet together and shoved the toes of both feet into his hungry mouth, eagerly double-sucking on them with utter glee.

Jeff and Damien couldn't help themselves either as their tongues lapped against Matthew's meaty size 11 soles. His feet were by this time covered in a thin layer of spittle, due to the increased efforts of the two men at this erotic activity. They sucked and licked Matthew's feet with reckless abandon, and were at this point hard as rocks. They knew they had to take care of their problem quickly, or else they'd cum in their sweat pants!

Removing themselves from Matthew's feet, Jeff and Damien got up off the bed, as if they'd had the same idea at the same time. They removed their shirts, with Jeff exposing his lean but toned chest, and Damien exposing his somewhat flabby torso, which was decked out with a nipple ring, much to everyone's suprise. After unbuckling their belts, they then pushed down their sweat pants, making this a sort of a striptease for their buddy who was still lying on the bed with spit-slick feet. Revealing their precum-stained Calvins, which were noticeably tented out, they completely stepped out of their sweats and pushed them aside.

For the piece de resistance, they pushed down their boxers in a seductive manner, with both men brandishing very thick tools which stood at rapt attention. Matthew practically drooled at the sight of seeing his two friends stark naked for the first time and had absolutely no resistance to their next plan, which entailed stripping him naked.

Jeff pulled Matthew's sweatshirt over his head and tossed it on the floor beside him, while Damien unbuckled Matthew's belt and slid his jeans down over his waist, a difficult task considering the large bulge in his crotch. After some maneuvering, Damien managed to strip Matthew nude below the waist, and now all three men were completely naked and totally horny.

Damien made the first move here and leapt onto the bed, which was slightly damp from Matthew's sweat. Parking himself down on Matthew's sweaty chest, he wagged his stiff, dripping cock in Matthew's face, telling him that he knew he wanted it. Matthew couldn't possibly say no, and put up no fight at all when Damien pressed his cock to his lips. He smeared Matthew's lips with his salty precum, which tasted just as delicious as his feet had tasted earlier. Letting his lips open gradually, Matthew eased more and more of Damien's thick cock between his lips and into his mouth.

Jeff, meanwhile, made his way to the foot of the bed and positioned himself between Matthew's legs. Stooping down, he fastened his lips over Matthew's dripping cockhead, licking up his salty offering and swishing his tongue around the purple knob of his engorged cock. His eagerness made Jeff's efforts all the more pleasurable to Matthew, and the same could be said of Damien as Matthew's own lips slid along the side of Damien's cock.

This wasn't the first time Matthew had sucked Damien's cock, and he knew exactly what turned him on. Matthew slipped his lips over as much of Damien's cock as he could, forming a vacuum seal with his lips and sucking with force. After having more than half his cock stuffed in Matthew's mouth, Damien moaned with the singular thrill of having your cock sucked, which was even better when your art buddy was the one doing it to you.

Matthew was engaged in a similar pleasure as Jeff went down on him. Of course, he wasn't expecting Jeff to have an ulterior motive in mind, and was disappointed when Jeff slipped his lips off of his cock, halting the pleasure in his loins. What he also didn't expect was that Jeff was merely slicking his pole for easier access. Jeff got on the bed and positioned his ass over Matthew's cock and sat on his cockhead. Easing himself down slowly, bit by bit, he revealed to Matthew that his goal was to have his throbbing dick shoot up his ass.

Matthew couldn't express in words his approval of his actions, so he merely assisted in the process by raising his hips, which made his cock sink up his rectum even further. Jeff grimaced with this still alien pleasure tinged with pain. He wasn't used to having a cock plunged up HIS ass, but he knew that eventually it'd be worth it. What made this great was that it was his one of his best art friends' cocks, and it belonged to one of only two people in the world that he would engage in this sort of activity with (the other being Damien).

With Matthew's rod shoved in Jeff's ass and Damien's cock in his Matthew's mouth, Jeff's stiff member was still left unattended. Matthew solved this problem hastily by reaching around Damien with his right hand and grabbing Jeff's thick pole with it. He worked his fist up and down Jeff's cock in time with Jeff working his hips up and down over Matthew's cock and Damien thrusting his cock in and out of Matthew's mouth. After establishing a rhythm, the three men were completely lost in their decedent orgy.

Matthew hadn't sucked dick in a long time (not since that time in Central Park with Jeff in the mid nineties). He had sucked off both Jeff and Ed Ruscha, the California Painter, in the past, but had never fooled around with Damien before. He was definitely glad he was getting the chance to do the latter now as his cock was enveloped by Jeff’s warm anus moving up and down on it. He would only ever do stuff like this with these guys, his best art friends guys whose work he really respected.

Damien continued thrusting his cock in and out of Matthew's mouth. He inhaled deeply at the sharp fragrance of raw man sweat, which turned him on even more and increased the ferocity of his sucking and the bucking of his hips.

Jeff was having a great time too, now that the initial pain of penetration had worn off and given way to sheer, unadulterated pleasure. Having a cock up his ass felt awesome! He had completely relaxed the muscles of his anus and allowed as much of Matthew's cock to slip in. He could feel it brushing against his prostate, even, as Matthew's thrusting of his hips coincided with Jeff lowering his ass down on his dick as much as he could. Matthew's cock was completely engulfed in Jeff’s ass as the muscles of his rectum sucked his hot, throbbing member in and out in cycles. Matthew was still jerking Jeff off, as well, so Jeff was feeling the combined pleasure of getting fucked by a stiff cock and having his own penis jerked off by Matthew. It was no matter of time before he felt the urge to shoot.

All three men were by this point highly aroused and on the verge of cumming. Jeff was the first one to let go, the pressure in his loins caused by Matthew's jerking building to a steady climax which resulted in his shooting his load. He cocked his head back and arched his back as a forceful blast of cum erupted out of his irritated cock and struck Damien on his back. His cock continued to churn out more jism which mostly ended up either striking Damien back or Matthew's stomach. The rest all dribbled down his own cock and onto Matthew's hand. Surveying the after-effects of his orgasm, he couldn't believe how fucking sexy it was that he had basted Damien's back and Matthew's torso in his cum.

Matthew was next to go, and he bucked his hips spastically with the onset of his orgasm. He thrust his cock deep into the recesses of Jeff’s rectum, who had at this point stopped his own motions due to relishing in his own orgasm. Moaning with pleasure, partly because it was an appropriate expression of what he was feeling and partly because he couldn't speak with Damien's cock in his mouth, he pressed up against Jeff’s prostate and let go with a thick blast of cum. His seed engulfed his own dick and the insides of Jeff’s ass as he pumped more of his hot cream into it. Matthew grabbed onto Jeff’s hips as he thrust his erupting cock deep into his rectum, relishing in the feel of his warm cum coating everything inside of Jeff’s ass.

Damien followed suit soon after and grabbed onto Matthew's head and thrust his cock as far down his throat as it would go. In no time at all, he was pumping his load into Matthew's hungry mouth. Matthew eagerly swallowed as much of his load as he could. He nearly choked on Damien's copious load, and what he couldn't swallow oozed out of the sides of his mouth. After he had churned out as much of his thick, delicious sauce as possible, he got off of Matthew's chest, completely spent, and laid down at his side by Matthew. He shoved his tongue into Matthew's mouth, delighting in the taste of his own cum in their mouths.

Jeff removed himself from Matthew's cock. Bending down by the side of the bed, he licked up the drops of his cum that had fallen onto Matthew's chest. He then moved over to behind Damien and ran his tongue along Damien's backside, lapping up the streamers of cum that had struck his back during the initial wave of his orgasm. Wrenching Damien away from Matthew for a second, Jeff forced his tongue down Damien's throat, letting some of his cum slip into his mouth. Damien returned the pleasure by reaching around and sticking his finger up Jeff’s freshly plowed ass. He could feel some ofMatthew's semen as he wiggled his finger in and out of Jeff’s loosened anus. Jeff moaned at getting fingerfucked. It wasn't quite Matthew's fat cock, but it still felt awesome.

The three men lay on the couch for another fifteen minutes, stark naked, sweaty, and relishing in their orgasms in complete silence.

Matthew stood up away for the couch. He turned and faced his panting buddies.

“Watch this!”

The two watched in amazement as Barney widened his stance, and posed in front of them, like a Greek god. With extraordinary muscular control, Barney began to raise his balls up towards his pelvis.

“Holy shit!” shouted Hirst.

With exquisite precision Matthew pulled his tight balls all the way up into his hips.

“Woooe...” stumbled Koons.

“You see guys, I’ve not only been working out the muscles that people see. I’ve spent the last 10 years getting my cremaster in tip-top condition. I'm a fucking Olymic athlete”

“You sly dog! That’s the coolest thing EVAR!” exclaimed Jeff, with a broad grin on his face.

With that Matthew turned and walked off to the bathroom to get ready for the opening. A few minutes later he emerged looking fantastic.

“You clean up nice” muttered Damien.

"Thanks, guys. I feel a lot better now. I think I can finally face the asses at this opening now, thanks to your asses this afternoon!" Matthew gushed.

Jeff and Damien smiled. They felt a lot better now, too.

Jeff proclaimed, “not only are we three of the most important artists in the world,” Matthew and Damien applauded in mock delight, “but we’re also three of the sexiest bitches on this mother-fucking lump of coal!”

“Amen!” declared Hirst and Barney.

The three hugged one last time, and then went out to experience their second major ‘opening’ of the night!

the end.

c "Simon" 2004